Questions About Wedding and Engagement Rings: Who Buys What and Where Do You Wear Them?

Whether a couple is young and in love or has spent many years together dreaming of what the rest of their lives together might become, when it is time to "pop the question," questions may arise.

How much money do you spend?

The myth that a man must spend three months' salary on an engagement ring is just that: a myth. It was part of a jeweler's marketing campaign in the early part of the twentieth century. It was a successful campaign, but that doesn't give it value. A better way to find out an appropriate amount of money to spend on the ring is to ask your wife to-be what she thinks and use this as the first of many important purchases you make as a couple.

Why buy an engagement ring?

An engagement ring is a symbol of the promise you are making to marry each other. The symbol can be as individual as the couple themselves. Some choose not to buy engagement rings at all, opting to buy only wedding rings. Some couples want the man to have an engagement ring as well.

Is it a secret?

It used to be tradition for the man to buy his bride to-be a ring in secret, but many couples do the shopping together nowadays. If you buy the ring with your partner, you will know she is getting exactly what she wants, and it will give you the option of buying a matching bridal set of rings, which includes the engagement ring and both wedding bands.

Who buys the rings?

It seems like everything about a wedding falls into a category of "he pays" or "she pays." Rings are no different. The man is traditionally responsible for his bride's engagement and wedding rings and the woman or her family is responsible for buying the groom's ring.

Where do you wear the rings?

In the United States, it is tradition for a woman to wear her engagement ring on the fourth finger of her left hand. During the wedding, the best man will hold the bride's ring and the maid of honor will hold the groom's until it is time to exchange vows and rings. Then the couple will exchange rings, placing the ring on the fourth finger of the left hand. The correct position for the engagement ring, when worn with the wedding ring, is to have the wedding ring closest to the hand and the engagement ring closest to the knuckle.

Why buy rings at all?

It is up to you whether or not you want to follow this or any tradition. Having a ring on your finger symbolizes love, eternity, partnership, opting out of the dating game, and any other symbolism that is important to you. Whether you spend three months' salary on a ring, buy his and hers engagement rings, or opt out of rings at all is not important. What matters is the promise and commitment behind the ring and the lifetime in front of it.

Alex Lemone is a bridal and wedding writer. For more engagement ideas and other wedding tips, visit Wedding Ideas Etc.

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